Friday, February 6, 2009

Questionable Intentions...

I consider myself a fairly social person. I like to go to parties, happy hours and all that good stuff. I like to meet new people too. However, there are a lot of people that when you first meet, ask you all sorts of seemingly innocent questions, when they are really trying to find out something else. (This is especially prevalent in the dating scene) We've all been in these situations and I'm sure you find it as incredibly annoying as I do.




I call them
Inquestionals: Poorly disguised questions that are an intentional attempt to obtain personal information about you.

Here's a list of some inquestionals and what the people are really trying to say.


1. Where did you go to school?
-Was my school better so I can feel intellectually superior to you?

2. When did you graduate?
-Are you older or younger than you look?

3. What do you do?
-Approximately how much money do you make?

4. What do you drive?
-Just checking to see if my approximation of your salary is accurate.

5. What does your dad do?
-How can a (answer to #3) afford to drive a (answer to #4)...must be family money?

6. Where do you live?
-Just exactly how much family money are we talking about here?

7. Where are your parents from?
-I can't tell if you're Japanese, Chinese, Korean, etc. (or any other type of foreigner)

8. How did you meet? (asking a couple, or from one person to a group of friends)
-Please give me some ideas on how to meet people, I'm so, so lonely.

Here's a few that the newly married couples out there always get...

9. So, How's married life?
-Are you completely miserable yet, or still in that annoying honeymoon phase?

10. When are you gonna have kids?
-When will the romance and spontaneity be removed from your sex life and your lives become miserable and completely absent of all freedom like ours?


And that's what I think about that. Any questions?

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Now, now I believe #10...

"When will the romance and spontaneity be removed from your sex life and your lives become miserable and completely absent of all freedom like ours?"

...is unfair. I don't believe you can say that hecause you do not have children. There are plenty of parents that have full lives. Of course your neice wants you to have children because "Doesn't uncle Jason know I LOVE kids?!?!?!"
While children do take away the "drop everything & go, sex in the middle of the living room, stay out all night drinking & sleep the whole weekend" they give you something better. LOVE! That is something a parent would never trade!

melissa o said...

I am glad that you have felt those probing (laced with toxic thought) questions too. :)

jschettini said...

number 7 should say foreigner, and "so so lonely" should be "so, so lonely"

Anonymous said...

You are very lucky that 2 people chose to "be miserable and give up all freedom" just so you could be here today and write this column.Having children can be the happiest time in your life.The love you feel from those little arms around you is worth more than any night out.I AGREE WITH JULIE..... this is a first!!!
M