Mydeas...

This will be the first installment of the section called "Mydeas". I admit it's a not particularly clever word for My Ideas. A decent title, but not quite word of the day worthy.

So I've always had ideas, mostly for inventions. I guess I've just always had the wiring of an engineer...at least from the idea side, rarely have I followed through and actually created something. It all started when I was little, like single digits little. I had a bit of an obsession for vacuum cleaners. Don't ask me why, but I did. One day I got an idea for an invention. I don't know if it's because I saw someone on a riding lawn mower, or what, but it just came to me...a riding vacuum cleaner. Big hotels, large carpeted areas, long hallways, it'd be perfect. At least I thought so...and actually still kind of do. So I went into the basement and attempted to attach the upright vacuum to the front of my Volkswagen cabrio power wheels. Let's just say, at best, it didn't work out. So here I am, about 20 years later and I still have ideas. Wacky, inappropriate and occasionally good ideas. Here's a couple:

We'll start with the "good" ideal.

A toothbrush with a built in toothpaste reservoir. For those of you that have seen the infomercial for "The Paint Stick", it's a similar concept. The non-brush end of the toothbrush would have a connector for a toothpaste tube to thread in and fill up the handle of the brush. Then when you are ready to brush, you'd slide up a little switch on the base and the toothpaste would come out of a little valve hidden in the bristles. No need to bring toothpaste when you travel. Just think of all the space that would free up in the 1 little plastic bag you're allowed to carry on the plane. Genius.

And now for wacky.

My wacky ideas are usually not at all practical, but make me laugh. It seems that lately there has been a barrage of commercials for air fresheners. It's unreal. Have you ever been in the aisle of the grocery store with air fresheners? There's typically no less than a full half of an aisle from floor to ceiling. (trust me, I know, I have Wegmans experience...Don't worry if you don't know what Wegmans is, It will be a topic for a later post...if not many posts.) Do we really need that many choices? So anyway, back to the point. All the commercials show air fresheners with multiple scents, automatic sprayers, extra plug outlets and who knows what else. Ridiculous. They make it seem like the aroma therapy is going to solve everyone's problems. I doubt it. Smells don't help people, medicine does. And, we all know what the best medicine is, Laughter. I say let's make an air freshener that tells a joke every time it sprays. That's right folks... "Scents of Humor" The funniest, best smelling air fresheners in the world. Just remember that the best thing for that unpleasant odor...(perhaps from a diasaster) is a good "Scents of Humor" of course.

And finally, Inappropriate.

As a man, I would strongly oppose this, since us guys love it, but I think the women out there might appreciate it. Many women wearing tight clothes, especially work out gear, face a similar problem. Camel toe, or possibly even worse, Moose Knuckle. I'm not going to link to definitions. If you don't know what they are, you're gonna have to look them up on your own. The product, appropriately named "No-Toz" would be a small flexible insert for the underwear, shorts or pants to conceal the issue. Pretty much the only reason I thought of this is just so I could direct the commercial. It would be full of athletic women happily running and frolicking round...Camel Toe Free. The background music? There's only one obvious choice, the 1980's hit single by The Go-Go's...."Our Lips Are Sealed"

And there it is, a small peek through the window into my mind and Mydeas.